Today has just been 80s outfits, angst, homework, and emotion-fuelled arts.
I think I need another release for my frustration other than painting and music, because I keep both extremely private. All my songs as of late are basically one huge mess of a whine about hating where I live and missing the city. But there's little point doing this really, because no-one hears it except me; so it's just reminding me of how miserable I get sometimes. It's a vicious circle of sorts.
So I'm determined to try my hardest to get my music and/or art out there. First step is getting feedback from Bloody Chamber Music - I think this is a great place to start for me, considering I have a chance to have access to my favourite musician's own record label, and there is a definite possibility (oxymoron, I know) that I'll get advice or at least acknowledgement from it.
I feel like a sulky little kid at the moment. I'm really annoying myself. Getting irritated super-easily, hating EVERYONE at least once a week, leaving drawings half-finished just because I get frustrated or bored with them. I should feel creatively charged, relentlessly getting myself together so I can send my demos before I see Patrick in December - I should feel lucky that I'm going to see Patrick in December, and that I have the opportunity to send music that he might actually listen to. But there's a haze of winter melancholia and inexplicable loneliness in the air and, while being perfect from a poetic angle, it's kind of ruining everything else.